I knew things had gone too far when my friend expressed shock that I’d dressed up for a holiday event. WTH? The thing is, part of my debt story is a story about buying endless amounts of fast casual and not so fast casual clothing. Coats, shoes, and and blouses were where my obsession lay. Makeup wasn’t my thing with the exception of getting glammed up for nights out. And I had expensive taste in accessories so I would try to be sensible and compromise on price. I would pop in at Forever21, Express, Gap, and whatever other stores caught my eye during mindless wanderings in the mall. Fast forward to 2019 and I’ve changed. And, so has my financial situation. I’m passing the mid-point in my debt repayment journey. And, in my single-minded focus to pay off debt and change my life…self-care accidentally slipped to the bottom of my list.
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Self-Care During Financial Journeys
It was financially smart for me to break up with shopping and spend less. I was spending myself into the poorhouse. Trips to the thrift store, mall, and every other store tapered off as I broke up with shopping. It no longer was an activity that I enjoyed…even though I loved looking nice.
Soon, though, I sort of stopped caring. Living in a casual fashion town it was easy to wake up and throw on a pair of jeans and a nondescript top or sweater. Mindless fashion at its best.
But, this unfashionable woman was not me. And, as time went on, I stopped feeling like myself and my self- esteem suffered. And, the other activities that I used to enjoy, steaming my face, mani/pedis, etc. I just stopped doing.
Things had to Change.
Last Summer
I dealt with a pretty bad case of depression. Debt-repayment fatigue, how I was feeling about my life and myself in general, and politics found me feeling pretty low. As I slowly made my way out of that experience, it was no longer ok to lose myself in the process of working towards a goal.
Self-care is no longer negotiable. And, it was important to acknowledge what was part of self-care for me. What exactly made up the components of “Michelle’s Self-Care” personality. And, if you’re nodding your head while reading this, I would like you to think about what constitutes self-care for you.
Here’s my list.
- Pretty clothes that make me feel good about how I’m presenting myself when I step outside my door.
- Well maintained hands and feet. Basically, I love mani/pedis.
- Fitness activities including but not limited to: yoga, dance, and hiking
- Mountain time
- Sleep
- Mini-Getaways
- Fun social activities
- Massage
- Mental health care
What Does This Look Like?
The conflict in my mind at the beginning of my financial journey was guilt, the perceived expense, and worrying that people would judge me if I enjoyed any of these activities while paying off debt. Fortunately, I’ve come to realize that there is more than one way to enjoy these activities and care for myself…without going broke. So, I ask-What does YOUR Self-Care Look Like?
How I’m Affording My Self-Care
It’s important for me to be a lot more intentional about self-care and have added a line item in my budget dedicated to this part of my life. I’ve also set a budget for the year and have looked at each month to see what’s happening when. Here’s an example for the beginning of the year:
- January-Ski Trip in Colorado. In order to keep this cheap I may opt to stay just for one night instead of several nights.
- February-Potential Retreat out of Town. In order to save money if I attend I have found alternate accommodation that is a quarter of the cost to stay in the retreat accommodation. And, I have discount coupons for airfare. It’s possible that I won’t attend this awesome event. And, I’m ok with that. I would save time and money.
- March-Instead of mountain time, I’m heading to the coolest place EVER! And, most people haven’t heard of it. Currently, I’m pricing it out and I’m super excited about this out-of-town excursion.
At this time of year I won’t be paying for mani-pedis, I’ll do my own. And, I am in the process of aggressively growing my income in general. It’s worth mentioning that my unsecured debts will be paid off by (fingers crossed) the end February. Then, I would have just student loans and another bill to pay off. The financial simplicity that I’m currently working with is incredible.
- Focus on the lowest price that allows access to the experience without changing the overall experience.
- Set a budget. Everything has been very carefully budget for.
- You don’t have to pay for all of your self-care rituals. I’m pretty good at giving myself pedicures, not so good at manicures. That’s ok. I will allocate my mani-pedi budget for the summer months when my toes are out LOL!
- Look through all of your coupons and maximize your savings.
- Change where you’re staying. Focus on the overall experience. Check out the following post where I detail awesome, affordable places to stay if you’re traveling while single. My goal is to stay in a super safe, comfortable space. I’m usually out and about when I’m attending special events. My accommodation is a place to sleep, shower, and nap. That’s about it.
- Do your research. Monthly therapy visits are a must. This past summer was mentally really hard and I never want to feel like that again. Fortunately, several other bloggers have recommended an affordable service that allows me to have once a month therapy sessions between $50-$100. Worth every penny.
- Free works! Denver is the best when it comes to having access to free classes. I’m able to take yoga and other fitness classes for free. After hurting my back on Thanksgiving, I’m no longer messing around with my core strength. It was SO FREAKING PAINFUL. Never again!
- Happy hours are a part of self-care. Just saying. I love going out and meeting new people. No, I don’t need to do this every week, but I was pretty hardcore about not doing anything that cost money for the past 4 years. I just wasn’t spending money at all. However, I will utilize free or fun events as much as possible.
- Rent the Runway-It’s time for my fashionable self to return. I’m dating again and there is no way that I can date looking tacky like I have been for the past couple of years. It’s time to look hot again. For me. Not for anyone else. How does it work? Basically, I am opting for the Rent the Runway Update option that costs about $89 a month for 4 different pieces. I can pause the membership whenever I would like and I have added a clothing budget line item moving forward. This is a pretty big deal because I basically was spending less than $500 a year on clothing. Sign up with my affiliate link as a new Rent the Runway user and receive $30 off your first order.
Let’s be clear, I’m not talking spending crazy amounts. I would physically be unable to do that. I’m talking a mani-pedi every 3 months or so, free yoga plus a a couple of paid classes, I’m not talking weekly happy hours but more than what I’m doing now.
Rent the Runway-I missed dressing up. But, I want access to NICE, well-made clothes without going broke. I liked the idea that one set of clothes got worn many times. While the dry-cleaning and shipping isn’t as earth friendly as I would like. Rent the Runway is a low cost way to wear pretty clothing and have access to better quality clothing as well.
Related Posts
Thinking About Starting a Blog?
I love blogging! It has been an incredible experience, transformed my life, and connected me with a ton of amazing people. Blogging is a pretty cheap activity and I recommend hosting your blog with Siteground. Many bloggers have begun leaving HostGator and BlueHost and moving to Siteground. Myself included! Read why I’m leaving HostGator and BlueHost (I have 2 blogs one on each hosting platform) and moving to Siteground. If you’re a new blogger Siteground will cost around $3.95 a month (depending on the size of your audience). They have great customer service and tutorials on how to host your new WordPress blog on Siteground
Online Business Resources
If you’re thinking about starting an online business, the resources below are a great way to get started.
- The Ultimate List of FinCon Community Products
- Courses
- Books
- Swag
- Make Money with Ebooks–There is more than one way to make money with your writing skills. I’ve created this course to help inspire, educate, and support writers who are sitting on a book idea…and are afraid to write it. This is YOUR year.Make Money with Ebooks is offered at three different tiers to meet different student needs.
- Self-Study
- Group Program-Includes access to the closed Facebook Group and twice a month live office hours.
- VIP Program-Includes access to the closed Facebook Group, twice a month live office hours, and 2 meetings with Michelle to work on book related strategies, goals, etc.
- $10KVA–Are you curious about becoming a Virtual Assistant as a side-hustle or a potential full-time gig? My friend Kayla Sloan is killing it as a Virtual Assistant and schooling other entrepreneurs in how to become a VA that earns on average $10KVA. This course is what I recommend as the first part of creating a virtual assistant business.
- Making Sense of Affiliate Income-If you’re looking to make affiliate income with your blog, Michelle Schroeder-Gardner’s course is the course that I recommend. She makes well over a $1 Million a year blogging and the biggest chunk of her income comes from affiliate marketing.
- IMark Interactive–Grayson Bell helps me with all of my website related tech issues and he is THE go to guy for WordPress related tech in the several different blogging niches (all the Personal Finance peeps work with him).
- Elite Blog Academy-Many bloggers have gone through this course and I consider this course the “Granddaddy” of all blogging courses. It’s not cheap, but in additional to getting all of the resources that are key to building an incredible blog, you’re also become a part of an insanely supportive (and huge) community of bloggers. Many of whom are making crazy money.
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