I remember it like it was yesterday…having yet another anxiety attack as I thought about going to work. The job that I loved so much had become a huge albatross, weighing heavily over all the decisions that I was making in my life. Also, I was not in the best financial shape and felt like (knew that) I had to continue working in a job that was slowly killing me off. Seriously. I began gaining weight. Five pounds settled on me one year, seven pounds the next. I would cry out of the blue, and I was angry ALL THE TIME. My hair started falling out and then my tooth broke. It was then that I decided something had to change. My body was talking to me. But, what I didn’t realize was that emotion affects your financial goals. I would soon realize that in years to come.
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Get Me Out of That Place
I felt like I was trapped in a never ending maze of dealing with everyone else’s needs instead of my own. On a daily basis, I would run around like a crazy person, trying to do everything perfectly, for everyone. It didn’t work. In fact, it made my life worse. But, I had debt, I owed people money, and relearning my financial habits was proving to be pretty freaking hard.
I began focusing on paying off my debt and killing my shopping habit (addiction?) so that I could lower my overall spending. I was able to reduce my yearly spending by $13,500 a year and it felt incredible.
- Same lifestyle? Check!
- Lowered monthly expenses? Check!
- Vague idea of what I would do when I decide to take the leap? Check!
There was one tricky little thing that I didn’t realize would become an issue. The emotion behind my goal would affect how I viewed my finances and future earnings.
I Just Need to Make “X” Amount
And then I can work for myself. If I make “x” amount, that will be enough. I will be satisfied and life will be great. What I didn’t realize at the time was that by setting the following goal: I just need “this amount”-I accidentally lowered my personal expectations about the following:
- How much I could earn
- The type of actions I needed to take to grow my income
I achieved the goal of making just enough so that I could leave my job, not starve to death, and pay a few bills. But, after a few years I was dissatisfied with my financial reality-I wanted MORE. Let’s be clear, I loved my lifestyle for the past 3 years:
- No commute
- Not having to ask other people’s permission to focus on what is important to me.
- The ability to prioritize where I focused my time and energy.
- Traveling when I felt like it.
- Being able to give back to the community that I live in.
Life has basically been pretty damn good. Until I had to admit to myself that I was dissatisfied with my finances. When I quit my job I was satisfied with making “ok” money because my goal was to be free of my job. And, I achieved that goal. And, I also had the idea that “I had to make enough” so that I could quit my job. I did that too.
It’s Not Enough
And, even though I’ve achieved some awesome things including paying off thousands of dollars in debt. I miss the intensity of working towards a really hard goal. When I was focusing on preparing to take the leap, it was a huge deal because it felt unattainable.
In fact, in my life, I’ve felt most alive when I’m working towards ridiculously hard goals that feel impossible. So, I’ve decided to own a goal that I’ve thought about every since I discovered that people could make life changing money blogging. I want to make life-changing money blogging. I would like to create content that helps my readers:
- Live happier lives
- Pay off debt
- Save more money
I would love to have monthly earnings reports that are in the 6-figures. And, when people ask me why I want to earn so much, I’ll say the following:
- To prove to myself that I can
- I would like the experience of earning A LOT of money. I’ve tried the other experience and we’re good.
- I want to pay off my debts! I have seven debts left (including mortgages). I was in the double digits before. I had so many debts I didn’t know what to do. Now, I’m starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s a REALLY faint light. But, it’s a light.
- I’m kind of addicted to payment notifications. I LOVE getting them. Now, I want to get MORE.
- Why not?
- To help other people!
- To slay an emotional issue connected to underearning. I never want to under earn again.
- To show other People of Color that it IS possible.
- To share my insights and help OTHER people make more money. A rising tide and all that.
Emotion Affects Your Financial Goals
And, the emotion behind my earn more money goal included fear and imposter syndrome. Who am I to dream so boldly? Well, I’m a bada@@ and it’s time to manifest the following:
- In 2018 I will begin making high 5-figure months with passive income
- In 2019-I will be able to double or triple those efforts
I love this goal because it’s HUGE. And scary. And, audacious. What do you dream about? What do you hope for financially?
Let me know,
Michelle
P.S.
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giulia says
interesting point of view, thanks for sharingit!
Michelle says
Thanks for stopping by Giulia!!
Chonce says
I totally agree with this! It’s funny what we can do when we change our mindset and emotions. Now that I’m done with student loan debt, my biggest financial dream is to own a home with my husband (and we are making it happen!).
Michelle says
I KNOW that’s going to happen this year. Looking forward to seeing the pictures of your new home.