I think it was New Year’s Eve 2006. Things weren’t going well. I was suffering from a lack of passion encompassing basically everything. The problem was made worse by a severe lack of direction and the beginning rumblings of the recession that would soon sweep down on us like a storm. Money was tight because I had too many debts and not enough month and a serious lack of personal focus. I was working my first professional job as well as working part-time at the mall. I would work in one town, race by bus to another and work the mall job. But, despite all my hard work the needle wasn’t moving. It was like I was standing still. So, I went and purchased something that night I think it was a coffee and pastry. The bank account was checked first and even though the purchase was cutting it close I would be ok. I went to bed after watching Dick Clark’s Rocking Eve as I wasn’t seeing anyone at the time my mind overwhelmed by the year to come. The next morning was quiet and still. I lounged in my bed and read a book, I cleaned my place, and eased into the day. It was the first day of the New Year, serene and peaceful. Until I decided to check my bank account. I logged in to quickly glance at my bank statement and then proceed with the day. But, after a glance at my account I felt like fainting. I could feel the blood draining from my face. Minus $330 (or thereabouts) Everything was red. I had had the occasional overdraft before, but not for years. This was serious. What the he$$? I had done the math!!! How could I get it so wrong? Well, I’ll tell you how. I didn’t realize that one of my debits hadn’t hit my account yet. That $10 or $20 dollar charge messed me up. Big time. But, what really messed me up were the following things: not having a savings, not having a cushion in my account (an amount that I can’t go under). What also messed me up was not using cash for small purchases, and basically not knowing what I was doing with my money. I existed without a financial plan and felt all of the pain of not having a plan that day. I proceeded to make an additional mistake that day. I took the overdrawn account as a sign that the entire year would suck. How stupid is that? It was mid-morning the first day of a 365 day year and I allowed this one event to define the rest of the year. Sadly, the rest of the year was pretty crappy. But, what if I had reacted differently? What if I had decided that this was a bump in the road and that I had to navigate around it? That tomorrow was a bright and shiny day? Untainted (for the most part) by the day before? Be careful of the power that you give to events that happen to you. Take a step back, see if there is a lesson to be learned from whatever happened. Brush yourself off and keep on moving forward. To react to situations in a calm and focused way is similar to “a practice” like what yoga practitioners do. Everyday, you have to focus and work on how your react to adversity. Some days you will react like a mellowed out yogi, other days you’ll be crazy. Just keep on trying. So, as 2013 gets closer and closer and you evaluate 2012 look at what worked for you and what didn’t. How did you react to the let downs, successes? How do you imagine 2013? Why can’t it be what you imagine? Start working towards whatever it is you want for yourself. I have.
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Nice post. You’re right, that was a bump in the road. Definitely something that could have been reacted to differently. I imagine it had to be a stunning moment for you though with working two jobs and all. I’ve definitely been there. 🙂 Look at all you have learned now! Pretty awesome. Happy New Year. 🙂
Kelly, there are days when I wonder if I’ve learned anything at all. I am focusing on being patient with myself and staying focused. Happy New Year!I hope it brings you happiness and wealth 🙂