Unfortunately, I’ve learned the hard way that it’s very easy to get stuck mentally in the negative moments of your life. I’ve had a lot of difficult situations in my life and I used to berate myself for choices that I made that made my life even worse. Then, I decided that life is short and that I would no longer tolerate beating myself up for making bad choices. Sometimes, people make bad choices. Because we’re human. In my journey towards sustained happiness, I discovered 10 tips to a happier life that were much easier to follow than I ever expected.
10 Tips to a Happier Life
- Mourn the past! So, things didn’t work out. Or, you created a mess in your life. You had to learn a life lesson the hard way. Remember, most of us are managing situations with the resources that we have during that moment. I’ve made a ton of financial mistakes in my life because I didn’t have a financial education. It has been painful educating myself about money and learning new habits, but, I love the person that I am!
- Let things go-quickly!! Have you ever gone over and over a choice or situation that you created in your life in your mind? You second guess your choices, you imagine all of the different scenarios if you had done things differently. “What if” goes through your mind all the time. What if you hadn’t dated that guy? Well, you did. What if you hadn’t spent that money? Well you did. What if you hadn’t made that choice? Well, you did. Figure out what lessons you’ve learned from the situation, acknowledge what you would have done differently, move on and let things go. Don’t be the person who refers to that situation over and over again. Let it go and flip the script. YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE FROM THIS MOMENT ON. Make future choices wisely.
- Flip the script-What does this mean? If you don’t like the results that you’re getting in your life-flip the script. This is NOT easy btw. Want to date more? Figure out where your ideal partner is hanging out. Go there. Look hot. Speak to people. Take action (I’m doing this right now LOL!). Don’t love how your life is going? Write down what isn’t working for you and create an action plan that you can actually stick to and then work that action plan. Never go out? Check out Meetup.com and commit to one activity a week. Keep it simple.
- Create space in your life-So that you can react to situations in a healthy way. Many of us have too much going on in our lives and all of the extra: negative people, clutter, debt, etc. can become distractions. I didn’t realize how big this was until I unwittingly stumbled on how great it is to create space in your life. I’ve spent the past couple of years eliminating debt, being mindful about who I surround myself with, getting rid of clutter, and the space that I’ve created in my life is GLORIOUS. I’ve freed up an incredible amount of mental energy and I’m able to react and respond to situations in my life without stressing myself out.
- Recognize and Cut Out-High-stress situations. It’s sad to say, but, many of us accept situations that don’t serve us well for way too long. I don’t care if the high-stress situation is related to: a relative, money, etc. You will eventually have to remove yourself from said situation. Period. I am on my debt-freedom journey and as debt after debt is eliminated the stress from that situation is eliminated as well. I was in fight or flight mode for YEARS and it took a physical and mental toll. I’m not debt-free, but, I feel so much healthier. By the way, your body produces hormones when it’s in fight or flight mode. As I cut out high-stress situations in my life I stopped feeling like I was being chased by my bad choices. And, I slept better at night.
- Treat people with genuine kindness-I love people. I love hearing people’s stories and creating connections previously not there. I’ve noticed that people don’t treat other people as kindly as they could. Maybe they don’t realize it. Maybe they’re busy, or maybe they don’t have home training. Whatever it is, I’ve noticed that when I treat people kindly-they are so appreciative (and, I get a ton of free stuff LOL!) Say “hi!” ask how people are doing, find out your favorite server’s name. Be interested in a genuine (non-creeper) way.
- Help someone or something in need-There is nothing better than being of service to others. There are a lot of ways to help other people without expectation. As long as it is a safe situation-do it! Be of service to others.
- Listen-Sometimes I feel like I’m not being listened to. This really bothers me because it feels like what I have to say isn’t valued. I heard somewhere that you should listen without creating answers while the other person is speaking. There is nothing better than having someone truly listen and respect what you have to say. Likewise, there is nothing better than having that reciprocated.
- Spend time outdoors-I live in Colorado. I spend a lot of time outdoors and I’ve learned a couple of things from the time that I spend outside. Whenever I’m in nature I find that I’m a lot more creative and that I get a ton of ideas for writing, for my life, etc. Going for a long hike in the backcountry (mountains) riding my bike, going for a walk, basically-doing anything outdoors makes me so damn happy.
- Journal-I’ve journaled on and off since I was a kid. There is nothing better than spending some time reflecting on the things that are on your mind. Basically, just acknowledging what you’re worried about. Recently, I purchased a new journal and I look forward to spending time reflecting on the different situations, etc. that are on my mind.
I only shared 10 ways tips to a happier life in this post, but, the reality is that there are tons of ways that you can become proactive in curating your own happiness.
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I am an obsessive foodie, but not self-righteous with it, love travel, meeting new people, helping you look good, and am freaked out by people who don't enjoying reading...something! Grab a Perrier, read my blog, feel free to drop me a line! Hope to hear from you soon.
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Absolutely agree with this post….I became a huge fan of small things like first cup of coffee in the morning, sunny day, a talk with a friend, read a good book after a busy day of work…#enjoythelittlethings
I love this. I like to keep things simple nowadays. Your list is very similar to mine.
Thanks for sharing. I think letting go of things quickly is a critical one. Life is too short, and the constant looking back will screw with your neck!
I used to dwell on stuff a lot. Now, I give myself a short amount of time then let that sh$t go.
I just don’t have the energy to hold on to things that don’t improve my life. Letting go of things has been a wonderful exercise in creating positive mental energy.