For the past 3 years I have blogged about my journey with money. It has been a frustrating, painful, stressful, and challenge process. A process full of lessons learned, surprises, and the twists and turns I never anticipated.
As I traversed my financial (money) landscape filled with land minds named: depression, want YOLO, I earned it, and I worked hard my understanding of why I was doing what I was doing with my money became clearer.
Stuff Became Really Clear
- It was clear that I reacted towards frugality in my family because the end game wasn’t clear to me. I didn’t understand the “why” we economized in the way that we did. Besides not having a lot of money.
- I had no sense of financial discipline-even though I had always worked really hard. This issue I think is common in most American households. We are more likely to use credit to purchase what we want than to wait. What if we’re missing out??!!
- As I broke my shopping habit (it was a habit) and used what I had I began to develop a deep loathing (maybe a disdain) for debt.
- Gratitude is key. I wouldn’t say that I wasn’t grateful for the things that were in my life. But being grateful and practicing active Gratitude are two very different sets of energy. I am thankful and grateful every day for everything that I have in my life. And I say it out loud, I journal it, and I think it. I understand that the irritations in my life are nothing compared to the lives that many live. I have my health, I have water, I have reasonably fresh air, I have a home, I’ve traveled around the world, and the list goes on.
I realized it was time to embrace a challenge that was audacious in its simplicity-stop using debt (credit, loans, etc) for the life that I want…and only use cash. How could something so simple be so audacious? I wanted to see what I could make happen. Perhaps you could call this “The Great Disconnect?”
The Role Of Debt In My Life
The use and procurement of debt has played many different roles in my life. Not all good and not all bad.
- Equalizer-With debt I was able to keep up with the Jones and live an aspirational life-like in the movies. This was a false sense of reality-I just didn’t know it at the time.
- Fed my “I need/I want it all now” YOLO! Until it was time for “uh oh!” you have to pay for those live in the moment, moments sooner or later.
- Education-While I wouldn’t make the same choice now, I made the choices that I did with the information that I had at the time. I am thankful for my education and even though I would never pay as much as I did again…I don’t regret my education. Just how I paid for it.
- Travel–Interestingly I’ve traveled both on credit and not. I’m not sure why I didn’t remember the lovely feeling of traveling debt free. I think that I just got caught up in the moment. Sigh.
- My home-Without my mortgage I wouldn’t have a home right now. I happily was wise when purchasing my home and used some semblance of common sense. I purchased the home that I needed for right now-and it has become my dream home.
The problem is that it’s so easy to go off the rails. I had no clear idea of what my “end goals” were. I had this vague idea of travel, a wonderful husband, and a “great life.” I had no clear idea of how that would happen. Wouldn’t I just work “really hard?” And, then 40 years later I would have this great life that I earned.
The thing is they all have been lying to us. The mortgage lenders, bankers, car dealers, auto loan companies, and universities. They’ve been telling us that it’s not possible to have the life that we want without debt. They lied.
When I removed debt from my equation I had to ask myself some questions. And I will be honest and say it’s amazing what happens when you ask the following questions to yourself:
- What’s truly important?
- How badly do I want what I want?
- What would I be willing to do (that’s legal) to get what I want in life?
- Is whatever it is that I’m wanting/purchasing important enough to exchange my life energy for?
- What is the end game for my life?
Asking those questions will simplify everything. Because you gain a sense of clarity that doesn’t exist until you question why you’re doing what you’re doing.
Cash, Quite Simply Introduces Simplicity To Your Life
Let’s be clear, it’s 2015 so of course I use automatic debits from my banking accounts to pay bills. And I use my debit card occasionally. I’ve just stopped using debt and it has been a lot easier to make the switch than you could imagine.
The few things that I seem to want are finding different ways to come into my life. It is astonishing how closing the door to debt opens the door to other options that indebted people can’t even imagine. My life is still basically the same: I go to concerts of bands I follow (free), I bike, I read, I go for coffee, hang out with my family and friends, and go to happy hours. The only major difference is I’ve embraced a level of self-control and financial discipline that hasn’t existed before in my life up until the past 2-3 years. I’ve found that my needs are few. Right now I am working hard to pay off my debts and I’ve been absolutely fine during the process.
No Suffering Happening Here
Strangely, the things that I want or need have been finding their way into my life for free or at low cost. I found two dollars yesterday, I was able to get a Kitchen Aid Soda Stream after an epic hack (post coming soon), an incredible Mixology class (free), a concert thrown by my favorite Spanish language group from COLOMBIA (free), art exhibits, hiking with friends, and crates of delicious free Noosa yogurt. Oh, and did I mention the car? That post will be coming sometime in August. Creativity and the ability to capitalize on opportunity is the key to the cash free life. And a constant focus on Gratitude.
It amazes me how completely we’ve been lied to. A cash free life is not that hard. It’s not easy, but it’s not hard. I have a lot of life to live ahead of me. Three more years of sacrifice in hopefully a long and healthy life is worth it for the living the bulk of my life debt free.
Or, you could just call me a hippy. I’m ok with that I have nothing to prove. So I will continue to ride my bike, grow my garden, go to Goodwill, and stay at youth hostels. And, I’m ok with that.
Have You Asked Yourself Similar Questions?
What is Your End Game?
What Are You Willing To Do To Get There?
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You hit the nail on the head with “gratitude is key” – at least that has been true for me. When I can be grateful for what I have, it makes me less likely to want more, more, more. And interestingly enough, it actually makes me want to get rid of what I do have!!! I’m grateful for it, but realize someone else probably needs those things, too.
Practicing Gratitude has been the #1 reason why I’ve been able to transition so easily to a cash budget. I’m just very thankful and appreciative of what I have. I realize that I have a great lifestyle and while I do need more cash..that’s an easy fix. I just need to work more.
I also find that patience is a big part of things. Generally when I want something I try and think now, “how can I get if for free?” I put a thing out on FB the other day about wanting a houseplant and someone said they had a plumeria plant for me. It’s not that I want to be cheap, but I do think if you wait, some of the things you want kind of just come to you. But that waiting…that’s the hard part. Glad this system is working out for you. I’m not using cc’s, but I do use my debit. I do miss the travel points with the cc, but I have a little debt so it’s a no-go for me right now. I’m glad at least I got to finance my trip to Fincon with the last remaining points.
Patience has never been a strength of mine but if I want to continue pursuing my goals then I’m going to have to make it a strength. I also used mileage points to finance my FinCon trip ($11 dollar flight!) I am just continuously amazed at how things are coming to me as I need them. It’s kind of mind blowing.
patience is aplus and paying cash is more simmply plus I noticed that if I see money material hang out from my wallet I put more attention in my shopping…however to help a little bit my finance from 1 august till 1st november I am in a sort of shopping ban!!!
Maybe I will join you in that ban! I’m now really focused on working more so that is taking priority over everything! I love my cash.
I’m with you girl. Using cash instead of credit makes me think twice about my purchase. It’s great to focus on gratitude and what truly makes you happy — which isn’t stuff! Don’t worry, I’ll be a hippy with you. 🙂
I think twice about everything. We’re such hippies. Did I mention that I’ve started learning how to make a lot of stuff. That’s a post for another day.
I switched to using cash a few months ago. It was challenging at first, but I have a much more control over my spending.
It is amazing how switching to cash has cleaned up my spending issues and clarified what is important to me. Life hours Tre, life hours.
I am working on financial discipline, control, and consistency, Michelle. I am willing to do whatever it takes to be debt free such as paying my student loan more than expected. It has taken me more than 2 years in paying this and I want it to be paid as soon as possible.
I am now in a really different frame of mind. It’s almost like a switch was turned (back?) on. I just want to work my a@@ off and get it done. I was slacking for the past month and now I just am FOCUSED. It’s kind of freaky. My brain is like that sometimes lol!
Is that you in the picture????? My end game is to start moving the ball forward for my family. I know that sounds vague, but it’s very clear in my head. While I want my kids to develop a healthy work ethic and not be materialistic in any way – I want them to have a HUGE head start (even if they don’t know it until their like 40). Starting over with each new generation is done.
Toni-I look nothing like that LOL!!! It just is a cool picture. I don’t think moving the ball forward for your family is vague at all. I think it’s super clear what you mean and I actually think that kids shouldn’t know that they have money until they’re about 40 LOL!
Using cash only really does help put your bottom line into perspective. When I use my credit card I can’t shake that ‘I’ll pay for this later’ mentality but it stings a bit when I have to make an extra purchase with cash so I try to use my credit cards less and less to maintain more control over my money.
I just am not interested in actively using credit anymore. Or, debt in general-so I had to make a huge mental shift. It has been a very freeing experience because I’m very aware of what’s going on with my money.
I think about my end game monthly. It consists of paying off this debt and taking a 3 month sabbatical somewhere. Once that is complete the next phase of life starts.
It’s all about the end game! You will be so happy during that debt free sabbatical-can’t wait to read about it.
Choosing a debt free (even mortgage debt free) lifestyle is incredibly freeing. Of course, many people use debt wisely or in line with their values, but for me, a debt free lifestyle is unlocking some options that I wouldn’t be able to consider if I had high monthly payments
I think that have experienced a huge “shift” in what I think is possible in terms of how how I live my life. I feel like we’ve all been sold this idea about what we “need” and we have to get it and it’s all a big lie. As I payoff bills, etc. I just never want to be someone else’s slave again for stuff I could care less about.